The [Disco Chives] Misplaced Parrot Complaint Thread
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Death by glazed donut, bacon cheeseburger.
It's called the Elivs.
So yesterday was a great day to do yard work. temperature was 20c or 69f for the low, high was 28c or 84f, nice breeze. I enjoyed being outside for a day, creating Vitamin D. The last three days have been great.
Fast forward to 6:16 AM CDT this morning: -3c or 26f with a wind chill of -19c or -2f. I got to get to the store. There is no sun today, with highs of 2c or 35f
There was a similar situation on this side of the state. In the morning we were all running around in T-shirts and shorts and whatnot. By the afternoon, everybody had to run from the car to the store and back to the car before they froze. And by the evening, we were just hoping nobody slid off the street on the way home. It looks like one person did.
I might have good news. My guardian is looking for some where else for me to live. I am hoping it isn't a group home as they are not a good match for me. They are too damn expensive and too controlling. They treat me like an idiot.
I remember a line from Chronicles of Narnia, where one character said that the animals have been called stupid so long, they actually believe it.
It seems that the staff and owners keeps gas-lighting me. Once one of the owners told me to throw everything away. Later she claimed she said just the trash.
Oh is that my ride?
They will not keep me long in a group home these days; instead of a Grumpy older man, I'm an angry old man. Just ask the last checker to ask me to use self-checkout; I told her I guess you are hiring me, so I think I can yell at you, get fired, and collect unemployment..
That's not how it works. That's not how anything works.
I am a grumpy old man, not an angry old man. I skipped several steps. Somehow, I went from being an immature 30-something directly to '...get off my lawn, defense wins champiosnhips, when I was a kid...' 60-something grouch. Rather than anger, I experience an acute humor associated with 'I told you so.' I now interpret the classic villainous movie line 'Bwahahahaha' entirely differently. I do not cause disaster, nor encourage it; I merely laugh at the seemingly infinite variations life can create to make 'I told you so' appropriate.
Bwahahahaha.
I saw an article in print (yes, real paper& ink) a while ago about grumpy old men. The headline was "Grumpy old men are smarter. Study says"
I saved the article because I resembled it. Will post it if there is interest. But I'll do it grumpily.
OT: The Grumpy Old Men, Complaint Thread
ordered a rocking armchair for using by my computer
which means when I am AFK I will be off my rocker too
matches my deep buttoned pouffe which is under my computer table
yes I have a solid wooden kitchen table older than me, (belonged to my parents) not a desk
Always something to learn: Hi, my name is "LG", and I am addicted to cop-cam videos on YouTube. It is amazingly entertaining and educational about how not to behave when in the presence of police, and generally in life. Today I learned that if you are skinny and you are in a grocery store trying to steal packages of steaks, and you are wearing only tight spandex clothing, you don't stuff the steaks down your pants.
And if you're female, the cop will make the joke "you're packing some heavy meat down there".
I watch the https://www.youtube.com/@theywillkillyou channel, I love the narrator and the incredulous tone of his voice at some of the stuff crims do
What am I doing? I forgot.
My favorite state-of-moronity commentator is "Ragical The UnHallowed Knight" https://www.youtube.com/@RagicaltheUnhallowedKnight. ; Yeah, yeah, his animations are simple, repetative and korny, but he sums up the situations quite well.
He sometimes comments about the bad words he hears and says "Hey, watch it! I run a family f*****g friendly business here".
Well, I don't know what you are doing now; but when you asked you were posting on the DAZ forum.
True story: Two of my 6 ex's (none lived in Texas) had a pilot's license. One commercial the other for pleasure. During my short marriage to the non-commercial pilot, he said three things, during flights, that were unforgettable.
1. You can;'t swim can you? (we were flying over an ocean)
2. If I wanted to commit the perfect crime I'd dump a body in a Hawaiian volcano.
3. If I ever wanted to commit suicide I would simply crash onto a freeway.
As a person who is periodically sacrificed to mythological creatures, I can assure you being thrown into a volcano is survivable (a little less so if whatever you're being sacrificed to is real). Regardless, when you set out to take revenge on whoever threw you in, they really dont see it coming. So, given a choice between the three, take the volcano...
Unless they intend to kill you first. Then take the ocean. Because there may be a sea creature that can save you with SeaPR.
this reminds me of a terrifying conversation I recalled between my parents as a child that haunted me for years until one day I finally broached it as an adult with my mother.
It was my Dad saying something about stabbing her with a needle under her boob in the heart and nobody would know how she died.
was just said at the dinner table while we were eating dinner
turns out there was a murder in the newspaper he was reading where someone did this and Dad was just remarking on how well endowed Mum was
LOL. Too funny. For the past 20 years I have been married to my 7th husband, my soulmate, and no longer feel the need to make choices pertaining to my survival.
Medical examiners be like, "It's the old 'needle under the boob' trick".
I believe you were trying to figure out if that was your ride.
That's why Heisenberg hasn't caught on like Uber and Lyft.
I figured out it was my ride.
I think I was trying to figure out how to cure my migraine?
I dunno if "oh woe is me" venting counts as appropriate subject to this thread in which case I lay the blame squarely on the misplaced parrot - namely this post. I sorted most of this while on a grocery run but still felt like venting.
I've aphantasia which kinda sucks balls. It's not a disability per say, but it feels like one. Not being able to visualize things in my head means that when I start anything the end result is not what I see in my head because - you know - I don't see anything in the first place!
Besides what my eyes see, that is. I mean for how many of you supposedly normal people things stop existing in a visual sense the moment they leave your line of sight? Think about your parents, or children, or other loved ones. See something in your head? Well, I don't!
How about that nice beach trip last summer? Maybe you can see in your mind's eye the white sand being lapped by rolling waves while sun filters through the canopy, providing a comfortable shade. Maybe you can even almost hear the sound of waves and the rustling of leaves in the wind? Maybe this didn't actually happen to you but you still get a scene in your head that includes imagery, sounds, and even smells?
None of that happens to me. I know it happened last summer, and can give you an index of things that make up the scene, but that's it. No visual imagery, no sounds, no smells, no echoes of what I felt.
Yet I've always been accused of walking with my head in the clouds and being a dreamer, and while it's true that I'm mostly running my life on autopilot while my head crunches data on some stupid and completely pointless subject, this is more because I find real life utterly unsatisfying. Like... on a scale of 1 to 5 I'd give real life a "maybe" 2. Especially the visuals are lacking which gets me to the real point of this rant.
Why are real visuals so bland? There are absolutely wondrous sounds and feelings but the colors are washed out and things are imperfect in the *wrong* way. Human skin is flat and boring. Things are in focus that would look better if the details were softer but at the same time there is no line art to make things pop against the background. Everything is just mixed together and the only way you can tell difference is based on the background blurriness or by subtle changes in colors. Yet somehow you can make out details like individual hairs that would look better as a voluminous blend.
Like take this image for example. The color theme is dark yet everything that needs to be in full focus is in fact in full focus while things that don't are ephemeral and flowing.
How about this image from Greg Rutkowski? Things are very detailed, yet there are a lot of flowing lines and painterly blotches that don't actually have any real detail at all, but at least my brain finds something extremely pleasant and purposeful in them.
How about something more digital? Like Sanyu's Art? These all have to common element in that they have colorful images and the details that are normally visible in photos (like individual hairs) are blended together to provide a pleasant whole. Everything is so much voluminious, there's just *more* of it, which makes it look good, but everything is also more crisp.
It's the same with movies. The scenery is often very pleasant to my brain because it brings out a lot of contrast and makes it easy to focus on things. This is especially true in movies that involve a lot of digital imagery.
Real life fall short of any of this and I'm not sure if it's because in my brain there's no room to anything else than what it sees. It can't visually *add* anything. It can only interpret stuff that I see.
This is problem to me since I am completely incapable of reproducing any of these. I can only produce 3D imagery that has all the flaws of reality but still falls short of actually looking real. Yet alone fantastic. I'd need to paint over and that's not a skill I've managed to acquire after having been almost 45 years on this planet.
I've these grand ideas in my head and I know what looks appealing to me but I can't reproduce any of them. It's so very frustrating...
/End of Rant
As an addendum to previous rant. I realized it's just not because my brain can't add details that are not there, it's because it wants to reduce the noise. I find beauty in complex and detailed patterns and chaotic things like flames, embers, smoke trails, raindrops, things covered in clear ice, caustic patterns (especially dynamic) cast through water, and lights in darkness.
I think the last one is because it takes away the visual noise and blends things together which is exactly what appeals to me in those fantasy illustrations. It actually gives room to imagination and because my imagination lacks the visuals, it helps my brain to add things which are not there.
I sometimes liken my aphantasia like having an elephant behind a black curtain. I know what components makes an elephant and I could draw its shape from those components (if I could draw). I just don't see it in my mind.
Other moments when the world feels more real... or I guess fantastic... are when sun shines after rain because everything has stronger colors and everything looks more crisp. There are also wintery moments just when the sun is about to rise or set when darkness already covers much of the ground and sky but everything has this blue cast - a blue moment it's called when everything feels more... I guess.. magical? More beautiful for sure.
I think there is more to this as I knew someone online who had your lack of a mind's eye as well as face blindness not even recognising her own husband unless he spoke or wore clothing she knew.
Yet she is very artistic
what she does excell at is storytelling with very descriptive details as that is how I believe she recalls stuff in her imagination.
associating things with other things seems very important
otherwise I cannot help sadly as I am the opposite daydreaming like Walter Mitty to the point of even endangering myself driving or running into lampposts
(I no longer drive but still sometimes distract myself badly on the footpath, you probably wouldn't run into some poor stranger so definitely advantages for both brain wirings)
I think I have difficulty using these forums on my iPhone. I'm trying to paste a word but it won't paste
I'm not an artist, I don't visualize images, I imagine the possibility of the image. I can remember what an elephant is supposed to look like, and I can analyticaly plan a scene with one, but I don't see it until it exists on paper or display. It seems that my "visualization" skill is rooted more in music. I go through periods of the day hearing familiar music, and even tinkering with it as it plays over and over in my brain. Sometimes I get so twisted up in it that I have to find a distraction to break me out of the cycle of repetitions & variations. I used to try to play some of my internal variations on piano, but was not very good at it, although perhaps a little better than my native stick-figure artistry. To that end, Poser and DAZ came to the rescue for my illustration needs.
Also, I don't remember people visually, but by voice and personality And when close enough, by smell. Those things I can do, but please, don't ask me to remember a name. Impossible.
That parrot is really coming through today. All of the commentary from everybody having their Van Gogh moments is very interesting. I think I'm one of those who visualize everything in their head. And I definitely recognize people in strange ways. I recognize people by the feelings generated by them rather than strictly the way they look. There have been lots of times I thought two people were the same person because they generated the same "vibe" but then it would be later pointed out to me that they don't look much alike.
Maybe one of the worst cases was when I was walking with someone on a walking trail and there was a man sitting on a bench. I stopped and asked the man on the bench if he was the same person we had just spoken to. Of course he wasn't. And the man I was walking with said "they don't even have the same color shirt". Well I never knew the color of the shirt or if either of them was even wearing a shirt. I just got the same vibe from the man on the bench as the man we had encountered earlier. And I as sure enough about it being the same person that I asked him about it.
There was a lady I met who had some fairly interesting mental health/emotional situations going on. And to me she looks very much like Katrina Bowden. It leads me to believe Katrina Bowden has similar issues, at least the sexual ones. Probably not the other ones. But I have no reason to believe that other than they look the same to me, which means I'm gettig the same feeling from both of them and one of the two people outlined those feelings in a wonderfully disturbing way.
Anyway, I think it's interesting how much (being unable to fill the mind with images) would create (the ability to fill the mind with everything else). Maybe it's just as good. Or one of those "blessings in disguise". On the other hand, the people who talk about blessings in disguise are often the same kind who tell you there's no benefit to being rich over being poor. I suppose I've thouroughly fallen off this conversation wagon by now.