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September 2023 - After the harrowing episode with the specimen, the guys needed to get away and relax. This also started as a Daz+ Inspiration Contest entry. In this story we learn that Richard boasts of many skills. And a new recurring character, Lola, is introduced.
Hosta La Vista, Baby!
Jack: Richard, we need to get out of the office and see the world.
Richard: Road Trip!
Jack: I'll pack the car.
Richard: I'm an excellent driver.
Jack: You know how to drive?
Richard: Yeah
And off they go, with Jack at the wheel. Soon they pull off at a scenic overlook.
Jack: Richard, look at this vista! There are hostas as far as the eye can see.
Richard: My eyes are too close together. I can't see a thing through this viewer.
Item used: Hostas - Low Res Foliage Plants
(My sincere apologies to all Spanish speaking forum denizens for this horrible pun.)
I Can Dig It!
Richard: Those hostas are nice. Let's take one back with us for the office.
Jack: We didn't bring a shovel to dig it up. Besides, are you sure we are allowed to do that?
Richard: There are thousands of hostas here; who will notice that one is missing? Besides we don't need no stinkin' shovel. I can dig it.
Jack: OK...
Jack: Richard! You are making a filthy mess!
Richard: Stop whining, Jack. I'm doing all the work. Go get one of those "clean up after your pet" bags to put this thing in.
Item used: Hostas - Low Res Foliage Plants
Busted
As Richard and Jack climbed back up to the parking lot with their bagged hosta, they spotted trouble.
Cooper: Hand over that hosta, you harebrained hooligans. You're coming with me!
Richard: Please, Super Trooper Cooper, don't haul us in. I'll replant it right away. We didn't see that big 3 foot high sign that says "Do not remove plants from this field. Perpetrators will be prosecuted." Really. My eyesight is not good.
All Cooper heard was "Meow".
Item used: Hostas - Low Res Foliage Plants
Book ‘em, Danny Cooper
The charge - Hosta heist in the first degree. Lock 'em up.
Richard was already planning how he would spring himself. Jack was just fuming about how another of Richard's schemes got them into trouble.
This image has been resized to fit in the page. Click to enlarge.
Item used: Hostas - Low Res Foliage Plants (of course)
(continued below)
And now we introduce Lola, although we didn't know her name until a bit later..
Maybe Jail Isn't So Bad
Due to overcrowding, it was three to a cell at the jail. Richard cleaned himself with his tongue, in the usual manner. Jack refused Richard's suggestion to give it a try.
Incarcerated Young Woman: So what are you fellas in for?
Richard: Purrrrr Purrrrrr Purrrrrr
Jack: Is it getting hot in here?
Item Used: dForce CB Lala Clothing Set for Genesis 9
Evening Falls
Well, it WAS hot in there. It was 100 degrees outside, and probably hotter in the stuffy jail cell. Tsk tsk. You people!
Jack is an honorable man. He kept his hands to himself. As soon as the sun began to set and the air cooled down, Jack buttoned up and took a little nap himself.
Richard was fine the whole time. He's used to going through life in a fur coat. He was enjoying the attention too much to worry what Jack was up to. However, that sequined dress was beginning to feel kind of scratchy. He could hear snoring coming from the jailer's room. Maybe now was the time to act!
Item Used: dForce CB Lala Clothing Set for Genesis 9
Freedom
Richard jumped off Lola's lap. (Yes, Richard got her name during their lengthy petting session). He slipped right through the cell bars and into the hallway. He padded down to the snoring jailer's room and grabbed the key ring off the hook. He tossed the keys to Jack, who opened the cell door. The three of them tiptoed down the hall, past the snoring jailer, toward the jail exit.
[Whispers inside the jail]
Richard: Hey, we should grab one of those rifles. I'm an excellent marksman.
Jack: You know how to handle firearms?
Richard: Yeah.
Jack: We don't need a longer rap sheet. We are heading straight for that door.
[Outside the jail]
Jack: Now, we have to find the car somehow.
Richard: Look! It's right over there! They must have towed it over here. I can hot-wire it. I'm an excellent auto mechanic.
Jack: You know how to fix cars?
Richard: Yeah
Jack: No need. I keep an extra key in my shoe.
Lola: Hey fellas, can you give me a lift? I'm working at the Mustang Ranch just down the road.
Jack: Oh, horses are beautiful animals!
Richard: I'm an excellent equestrian.
Jack: You know how to ride horses?
Richard: Yeah.
Lola: Ha ha, sorry fellas - no horses at the ranch - only girls.
Lola: Richard, you are amazing! How can you be so excellent at so many things?
Richard: I'm an excellent liar...
The End
Item Used: dForce CB Lala Clothing Set for Genesis 9
And the story continues as we learn that Richard just might have those skills he claims - or he just might be a bit delusional. You decide...
It just dawned on me that Lola works in a CAThouse (Mustang Ranch)! She is the purrrrfect girlfriend for Richard! They've already developed a close relationship in jail, and Lola is very impressed by Richard's many skills. How could I not have seen this coming? Will Jack be jealous or relieved that Richard has found someone else to spend time with?
I'm an Excellent Equestrian
Lola visits Richard in his home. He shows her that he really IS an excellent equestrian. She thinks he is quite cute, if a bit delusional.
Item Used: dForce CB Lala Clothing Set for Genesis 9
I'm an Excellent Driver
Note: I'm an Excellent Driver is one of my favorite renders ever!
Richard and Lola are out on the town, so he can show off his driving skills.
Richard: Look, I can drive up and down and forward and back, and the tractor rental is cheap - only 25 cents per ride.
Lola: Whee! Do it again, Richard!
Richard thinks to himself: Impressing a woman is a lot of work!
Item Used: dForce CB Lala Clothing Set for Genesis 9
I'm an Excellent Auto Mechanic
Richard: See, I replaced the batteries and this dead truck is running perfectly again! I'm an excellent auto mechanic.
Lola: I think I'll keep my feet safely up here on the sofa. Your paw is not designed for precision joystick control. I don't know what that truck is going to run into next. I don't want it to be my bare foot.
[ Poor Richard, yes, he was right. It is hard to impress a woman.]
Item Used: dForce CB Lala Clothing Set for Genesis 9
I'm an Excellent Marksman
Richard: I'm an excellent marksman. I almost never miss the wall.
Lola (clapping): Woo hoo, Richard, you only missed once so far.
Richard: I don't count that as a miss. That horse should know better than to get between me and my target.
Item Used: dForce CB Lala Clothing Set for Genesis 9
The father of an old friend used to say, "sometimes I sits and thinks, othertimes I just sits"
I often reminisce about these old stories, and I don't even have a fire to sit by.
@barbult: I just love these renders of Jack and Richard! Both have been objects or my renders over the years, Richard have been spared the last years but Jack always gets to be the "Sample Image" in the RRRR contest these days.....
Well I can't say I blame Richard for his attempts to impress Lola, she's quite a classy blonde after all ... however ...
Jack Said:
"Is it getting hot in here?"
It doesn't work, they got wise to that one years ago!
I wonder if Richard's been caught exercising the gentle art of extracting food from sometabby and their human?
Regards,
Richard
I'm back with more old Jack and Richard stories from the past. This story is from the September 26, 2023 Daz+ Inspiration Contest. Watch how user comments turn the single render into an ongoing story. I never know where these stories will go, until user comments inspire me.
The Hamster is Gone!
Trouble at Daz.
Rob: Jack, check the server room. The SCM is down again. This is going to delay Daz Studio 5 by months! [Comment 2025: I think Daz Studio 5 died entirely. We now have a Daz Studio 6 Alpha}
[Jack arrives at the Daz server complex in the basement]
Jack: Yikes! The hamster is nowhere to be seen. All the server lights are red. The gateway is padlocked. No traffic can get in or out. The big neon status sign says Error 504 again. The place is overrun with rats. Richard is supposed to be keeping them under control, but he spends all his time with that Lola and neglects his duties. What can we do?
Item Used : FH Server Room
Richard's Robotic Rodent Remover
Richard: If you guys would have installed this system when I delivered it, you wouldn't be in this mess now. And be sure to update the apps, so it can tell the difference between the server hamster and the rats. I'm busy. I see a box! I must explore. It's probably a good place for a nap.
Item Used : FH Server Room
Rats, Cold Pizza
Richard finally awoke from his nap in the box and went home to Lola. She was fixing tuna for dinner - his favorite. At last, the box was free! Jack grabbed it and set it up for the drone to deposit its hoard of stunned rats. Once full, Jack would send it off to Karni Mata Temple, where the rats would live long and pampered lives. Jack wasn't invited for tuna, so he grabbed a pizza. "Rats, this pizza is cold" said Jack, as he tossed it in the box. "And I still can't get these servers running." he added. "I'll probably have to grovel and call Richard back to help."
Item Used : FH Server Room
Help!
Lola: Richard, Jack's on the phone. He wants to talk to you.
Richard: Put him on speakerphone.
Jack: Help! I tripped over a cord and now all the servers are black. Please come and help me! I don't know what to do.
Richard: We are just starting dinner. But I'm an excellent ser...
Lola: RICHARD!
Richard: Well, no, I'm not an excellent server fixer, but Lola is an IT wunderkind. She is head of the whole IT department at the Mustang Ranch. Lola is an excellent technician! We'll come over as soon as we finish dinner. It might be a few hours. This tuna is BIG! Lola is having her's broiled, but I prefer Sashimi.
Jack: Please hurry. With no servers running, it is freezing in here. Wear your coats.
Richard: I always wear my fur coat.
Item Used : FH Server Room
An Excellent Friend
Richard and Lola finally arrived at the server room to bail Jack out of his trouble.
Jack: I'm freezing to death in here. Lola, can I borrow your coat, please?
Lola: Sure; you look like an icicle. [looking around] OK, I see the first problem. We'll start by plugging the server rack back into the wall outlet. Now, show me to the admin console....Windows Server 2012! You've got to be kidding. Don't you people know that the end of life date for this product is only 4 days away? Who is responsible for maintaining this system?
Richard: Not I. I'm only a forum admin. I'm feeling kind of lethargic after that big tuna dinner. I'm going to curl up over here and have a little cat nap.
Jack: Not I. I'm only in charge of Daz+. I'm going to snuggle up in this warm coat and try to thaw out.
Rob: [sticking his head around the corner and stepping carelessly on the server power cord] Not I. I'm the Wiz. I only develop code and scripts.
Little Red Hen: Not I. I only sow wheat and bake bread. I'm going to round up my chicks now. [What is this, a barnyard? How did chickens get in here?]
Lola: Well then, I'll do it myself. [And she did!]
Jack: Hurray! Lola, you are an excellent friend!
The end of another silly adventure
Item Used : FH Server Room
It occurs to me that if you could get the chicks imprinted on a suitable target you could put them in a whole set of hamster wheels and they would be far more reliable than actual hamsters.
Now I'm inspired. Chicks on wheels. That could be interpreted at least a couple ways. But I don't have a hamster wheel, and I don't like the plastic one in the store. Every hamster I ever owned as a child had a metal wheel. I see some in other stores, but maybe I can make one. You know, why spend a couple bucks when you can spend a dozen hours of frustration doing it yourself?
Sorry. For the rungs, make a long, thin cylinder and a null at the axis point, parent the cylinder to the null, duplicate the hierarchy as many times as needed and rotate the nulls to spread them out. The support frame might be trickier.
Reminded me of a small Thai food "hall in the wall" place close to a friend' place like 15 years ago. They had several "fun names" on the dishes, but what I still remember was their name for "Chicken Cashew", "Chicks with nuts".
My wheel is well under way. I have a wonderfully useful script that @richardandtracy posted to to instance things around in a circle. It worked perfectly to place my cylinder rungs on my torus wheels. Yes, the support frame is harder. I used Mesh Grabber to bend some cylinders. It is passable only. From a distance it will be fine.
Edit: Hmmm. I based my wheel on one I saw online. I now realize that the design is critically flawed! The support would not hold the wheel. The Wheel would fall to the ground. Oh well, I think I'll go with it anyway.
Cashew Chicken used to be my favorite until I had Orange Chicken from the Cheesecake Factory. Unfortunately the closest Cheesecake Factory is over an hour away.
Chicks on Wheels
Richard awakens from his nap with a big yawn and a brilliant inspiration.
Richard: Jack, I've got it! The server hamster is no good. What we need are chicks on wheels!
Jack: I just don't see how that would work at all.
Cross-species communication is always an issue, mice never seem to understand what I mean by fun.
That's a Big Posse!
One day I was rendering some LowPi cowboys on horses. I made quite a large crowd and decided they must be a posse chasing someone...
Who are they chasing? Probably Richard Haseltine, I suppose. He must have gotten into some mischief again. I hope he can run fast.
Yup, it was Richard they were after.
The One Who Got Away
Good as always, but I'm surprised you didn't take Richard's comment during the Sinclair C5 discussion as an idea (especially as there's a Sinclair C5 on Sketchfab).
I thought you might have had Jack as the driver, shades on, huge grin on his face and throroughly enjoying himself. Meanwhile poor Richard is popping his head out of the boot with his claws dug securely into Jack's shoulders, hanging-on for dear life!
Story wise, Jack would even have reason to find himself a Sinclair C5, after Richard's stories about its secret development.
Too many opportunities, too little time.
Thanks for dropping by to comment. I've been following up on Richard's statement about being an excellent infiltrator. "I'm an excellent..." has become a recurring theme in these stories, so I couldn't let that one pass by. It has taken me two days to get a vest on Richard over his fur. He wasn't even squirming. LOL. I gave up on fitting any existing clothing and finally went to Marvelous Designer to make him a custom vest, such as it is. He has to go without pants, because I haven't the energy to go through that again right away.
I'm an Excellent Infiltrator
Once Richard got safely home, he decided he should go back to town and infiltrate the posse. After all, he is an excellent infiltrator. (Just look at how he sneaks into almost everything I render!) He tucked his ears up into his cowboy hat, put on his best western vest, and saddled his trusty horse. He wanted to blend into the posse crowd as much as possible. Will he succeed?
Yes, it is pretty reliable. Beware of fancy lens though, my mother was persuaded to have some that allow more than one focal distance and they cause bright lights to have haloes, she had to stop driving at night and wasn't keen on being a passenger at night.
---------------
II have a nasty feelng I am going to be relying on the posse having les than perfect vision too....
I Want to Join the Posse
Before Richard got far, he realized that if the posse men had any decent eyesight, they could probably tell he was a cat. So he decided he needed to hide more fur and his paws. He went back and put on the onesie pajamas that Lola gave him for Christmas - the newborn to 3 months size with footies and hand covers. He headed off again to town. When he arrived, he found one of the posse men sitting outside. Richard pulled his hat down over his eyes to hide his face the best he could.
Richard: I'm new in town. I want to join the posse and do my part to keep this town safe.
Posse man: Well, I don't know. What are your qualifications?
Richard: I have my own horse and I am an excellent marksman. I left my weapon at home, though.
Posse man: I'll have to talk to the boss and get back to you...
If I thought making a vest for a cat was hard, I had no idea how hard it would be to make pajamas. I do think they turned out to be "the cat's pajamas", though!
you did an awesome job fitting the clothes
I have tried without success on all the cats that are not already semi anthropomorphic ie Catoon
Thanks, Wendy. It took me three days in Marvelous Designer. I made them to fit that pose. I couldn't figure out how make them generically to become rigged clothes. The trick I finally came up with to get the clothes to fit over the fur, was to use a push modifier on Richard to make him bigger, close to the size of where his fur ends. Then I exported that to use as an avatar in Marvelous Designer. There was a lot of trial and error involved in this whole process. The pattern I ended up with for the "pants" and "Shirt" look very little like patterns for humans. After I got them stitched up in Marvelous Designer, they were too loose, so I used the Weft scaling to shrink them down. Then I exported them as an OBJ. I smoothed out a few areas with Blender. Then I just parented the OBJ to Richard in DS and applied a shader to them.
ah bespoke clothing
Nice disguise, but I suspect the horse is giving me side-eye anyway. Still, it's the humans that get the votes.
That is reassuring.
A Runaway?
Posse Man 1: Hey, Boss, there's a dude outside who wants to join the posse. He has a horse and says he's good with a gun, but left it home. I seen the horse and it seems not skittish at all. The guy is terrible short and the horse is puny, too - maybe a pony. You know I ain't got good eyesight, but I could swear he was wearing jammies.
Boss: Did he look young?
Posse Man 1: His hat was tipped down. Couldn't see his face good.
Boss: Probably a runaway kid hiding a bad case of acne. All our guys are getting on in years. Half can't see and the other half can't hear. Some young blood could be good. We might give him a chance, but we have to be sure of his motives. Tell the guys to be on the alert. We can't accept an infiltrator who'll find out our secrets.