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Comments
It is best not to try to analyze the rationality of Richard Haseltine related renders.
There is no pretense of reality here.
Trying to highlight further things that could go wrong, completely by accident of course, that's all.
Regards,
Richard
Surely I am on everyone's "most wanted" list? (Hopefully not most anted as I initially typed. Some of these are attributable to the keyboard.)
You top my list of "most wanted" cat forumers. Forumers?? I think that is a new word.
You know he just wanted the box it came in.
Nightmares
Although Richard is proud of being "Most Wanted" by everyone, he has nightmares about being arrested again if the FBI is able to pin the BBQ bombing on his careless balloon inflating.
Hmm, I don't think I am that short normally. Maybe I was slumping a bit.
True.
And if they do use photo ID, there iis at least some room for confusion thanks to the little Jacks.
You mean the little Toms - Tom, Tommy, Tomalin, Thomas and Tom boy. That's a good plan! Tom is Ron's cat, after all. Who's to say that Tom was not the one to fill the balloons for his human's party. Good thinking, Richard. We can always count on you to get out of a jam - and get into another one later.
Jam yesterday, jam tomorrow, but never jam today.
You always amaze me with the breadth of your knowledge. I always have to Google these things to see where they come from.
Jam TODAY! Jam Gone Away
TLDR: Richard and four Toms got out of the jam they got in, when they looked so much alike, no individual one of them could be positively identified as the balloon deliverer.
The Story: The FBI agents scoured the area of the BBQ bombing for evidence. They found balloon shards that had been blasted around to periphery. Forensic testing found hydrogen contamination on those balloon shards. Aha! Bombing by hydrogen filled balloon.
The FBI canvased the area for possible eye witnesses. Several people reported an orange cat delivering red and white balloons to the party. This cat was seen driving a large brown delivery van. Reports stated that he was an excellent driver. At one point the van broke down and he managed to repair it quickly; he was an excellent auto mechanic. When the van finally just quit, he gathered all the balloons from the van and commandeered a police horse to get to the BBQ location. He was reported to be an excellent equestrian, riding skillfully while having a firm grasp on the balloons. When he arrived at the BBQ location, he saw that a water main had broken and had flooded the street. He grasped all the balloon strings in his teeth and swam across the flooded street. He was reported to be an excellent swimmer. Judging from the accuracy with which the BBQ party site was destroyed, he must have been an excellent marksman.
The FBI agents were tasked with rounding up all of the suspicious orange cats in the vicinity. "We'll put them in a lineup and get the balloon store salesman to identify the culprit", they thought. Each cat was lined up with a number. When the balloon salesman looked them over, he said "They all look the same. I can't tell one from another." So, the lineup was a bust. Without positive identification, no charges could be filed. The cats were free to go. Tom, Thomas, Richard, Tomalin and Tom Boy left the station, relieved to be off the hook. Tommy was safe all the time, having made it back to Miss Kitty in Dodge City, following the detailed map that Richard had drawn for him.
[ Too many words, I know. Some days I just can't stop writing about Richard and his adventures. This sort of ties together some earlier escapades. ]
Yay!
Yes, indeed. Another narrow escape for Richard and Tom, and the other Toms.
My friends and I are still enjoying your (our) story.
Narrow escapes are always the most fun.
Richard Attempts a Narrow Escape
Cats may be "liquid" but their head can still pose a problem.
Fun, not funnel :(
But think of the glory if he succeeds!
Oh, did I misread that?
I think I should have titled that render "Fun with Funnels" or "Funnel Fun". I do like alliteration
background implies that the Guinness Book of Records may be standing by to see if you make it through. Best of luck to you, Richard, but it looks impossible from here.
Crowds are gathering and there's a sense of excitement here which we haven't seen since 'Ron Obvious' attempted to jump accross the English Channel , which would have beaten his previous best of eleven feet and six inches. ( Monty Python 'The First Man to Jump the Channel' )
Grandbaby Richard
Lola's mother treats Richard as if he were her grandbaby. When Lola and Richard come to visit, Lola's mom puts Richard in a baby crib filled with stuffed animals. He finds the situation a little unsettling.
Ah, but he's so cute!
The question is always "Are they soft enough to be stamped into a comfortable bed?" I think a lot of those are a bit too well-padded to yield. Also, I may have picked up a slight thing about bars during my previous adventures.
I think you'll have to shove them all to one side or throw them overboard. Throwing them overboard might make Grandma mad, though. She spent a lot of money on all those stuffed animals for you, I bet.
Close your eyes; you won't see the bars. Problem solved!
In a couple days you and Lola will probably go back home and leave the animals and bars behind. You can tough it out for a couple days.
Hmm, it certainly might not be a good diea to bring up the episodes invovlng bars with Grandma, she might be less than impressed.
Oh, so you and Lola never told her where you met!