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barbult's take on the lives of Jack and Richard

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  • barbultbarbult Posts: 26,156
    edited August 22

    I Love you, Richard

    Milly grabs Richard and gives him a huge hug. Richard tries to purr in response, but Milly has hugged all the air out of his lungs.

    Milly: I love you Richard. Thank you for the pretty horse.

    (Don't worry. Milly will put Richard down before he passes out from lack of oxygen.)

    Milly Hugs Richard_001_Camera 1.jpg
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  • Richard HaseltineRichard Haseltine Posts: 107,864

    barbult said:

    Richard Haseltine said:

    barbult said:

    Richard Haseltine said:

    Ooooh, Jack was sneaky (except, of course, I just wanted an excuse to let Milly have the horse. Obviously.)

    I would consider giving her a toy six-shooter to reward Jack, but it is possibly going to be a while before I feel entirely happy around guns that go bang (or pop).

    You could give her your dart gun - the one you shot your horse with when you were showing Lola what an excellent marksman you were. After all, Milly has the horse now. She might has well have the gun too. (Poor horse!) 

    Ah, yes - that should delight her (and Jack).

    On second thought, Jack's wife would probably ban you from all their lives and property forever. Gosh, she has no sense of adventure.

    I don't know, she has been pretty intrepid pursuing me with a broom.

  • Richard HaseltineRichard Haseltine Posts: 107,864

    barbult said:

    I Love you, Richard

    Milly grabs Richard and gives him a huge hug. Richard tries to purr in response, but Milly has hugged all the air out of his lungs.

    Milly: I love you Richard. Thank you for the pretty horse.

    (Don't worry. Milly will put Richard down before he passes out from lack of oxygen.)

    Oof.

  • backgroundbackground Posts: 588

    For a small child, a drum and a trumpet are great gifts ( even better if there are twins ), so long as you don't have to live there.

  • memcneil70memcneil70 Posts: 5,237

    And the giver will never be invited again.

  • backgroundbackground Posts: 588

    Oh that's why I don't hear from that family any more!

  • Richard HaseltineRichard Haseltine Posts: 107,864

    background said:

    For a small child, a drum and a trumpet are great gifts ( even better if there are twins ), so long as you don't have to live there.

    I was trying to stay on theme  with the horse and western setting though, otherwise that is an excellent idea and I will make a note for future use.

  • barbultbarbult Posts: 26,156
    edited August 23

    Pogo Stick?

    Richard: (to himself) Well, time to go home. I hate the idea of walking all the way back. I thought I'd be able to ride my horse back. Oh, look! Jack has a Pogo stick out here in the garage. I'll just borrow it and bring it back next Wednesday. Hey, it has a motor! I won't even have to wear my legs out hopping. This is awesome - even better than riding a horse! it's awful noisy, though, and the ride is a little rough.

    Richard with Pogo Stick on Driveway.jpg
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  • Richard HaseltineRichard Haseltine Posts: 107,864

    Well, Jack did want to try it out - by proxy is better than nothing.

  • memcneil70memcneil70 Posts: 5,237

    ROLF

  • barbultbarbult Posts: 26,156

    memcneil70 said:

    ROLF

    ROFL?

  • barbultbarbult Posts: 26,156

    Richard Haseltine said:

    Well, Jack did want to try it out - by proxy is better than nothing.

    I hope Jack was planning to tear up that concrete slab and put down pavers. Maybe you are being more helpful that anyone realizes. 

  • richardandtracyrichardandtracy Posts: 7,077
    barbult said:

    memcneil70 said:

    ROLF

    ROFL?

    Smell Checker?

  • memcneil70memcneil70 Posts: 5,237

    barbult said:

    memcneil70 said:

    ROLF

    ROFL?

    Roll on floor laughing. Old text message quick reference thingie. 

  • Richard HaseltineRichard Haseltine Posts: 107,864

    memcneil70 said:

    barbult said:

    memcneil70 said:

    ROLF

    ROFL?

    Roll on floor laughing. Old text message quick reference thingie. 

    She was pointing out you had written roll on lino, flailing.

  • barbultbarbult Posts: 26,156

    Richard Haseltine said:

    memcneil70 said:

    barbult said:

    memcneil70 said:

    ROLF

    ROFL?

    Roll on floor laughing. Old text message quick reference thingie. 

    She was pointing out you had written roll on lino, flailing.

    laugh I was wondering what ROLF might be. Now I know. My bad, for not being up on the latest slang. laugh

  • SimonJMSimonJM Posts: 6,067

    barbult said:

    Richard Haseltine said:

    memcneil70 said:

    barbult said:

    memcneil70 said:

    ROLF

    ROFL?

    Roll on floor laughing. Old text message quick reference thingie. 

    She was pointing out you had written roll on lino, flailing.

    laugh I was wondering what ROLF might be. Now I know. My bad, for not being up on the latest slang. laugh

    I thought ROLF meant Ridiculing Old Leonine Failing ^_^ 

  • barbultbarbult Posts: 26,156

    SimonJM said:

    barbult said:

    Richard Haseltine said:

    memcneil70 said:

    barbult said:

    memcneil70 said:

    ROLF

    ROFL?

    Roll on floor laughing. Old text message quick reference thingie. 

    She was pointing out you had written roll on lino, flailing.

    laugh I was wondering what ROLF might be. Now I know. My bad, for not being up on the latest slang. laugh

    I thought ROLF meant Ridiculing Old Leonine Failing ^_^ 

    Could be. Some acronyms have multiple meanings. Both seem plausible in this case. I think Mary was onto something. We were just slower to pick up on it. 

  • barbultbarbult Posts: 26,156
    edited August 24

    ROLF!

    Inspiration comes from many places. Thank you, Mary, Richard, and Simon.
    Richard can't stop twitching after riding the jackhammer "Pogo stick" all the way home.

    Richard ROLF_002_Camera 1.jpg
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    Post edited by barbult on
  • barbultbarbult Posts: 26,156

    I like the way these stories get me to use things in my library. My husband was the one who mentioned using a jackhammer. I went looking for one in the store and discovered that I already had purchased it. I wonder when and why that happened? The old battered furniture in this latest render is something I bought from my wishlist very recently, so I used it. It seems to go with the linoleum idea. The "linoleum" in the scene is a Filter Forge texture.

  • vwranglervwrangler Posts: 4,970

    barbult said:

    ROLF!

    Inspiration comes from many places. Thank you, Mary, Richard, and Simon.
    Richard can't stop twitching after riding the jackhammer "Pogo stick" all the way home.

    Well, after that, now he really needs to be rolfed. 

  • barbultbarbult Posts: 26,156

    vwrangler said:

    barbult said:

    ROLF!

    Inspiration comes from many places. Thank you, Mary, Richard, and Simon.
    Richard can't stop twitching after riding the jackhammer "Pogo stick" all the way home.

    Well, after that, now he really needs to be rolfed. 

    He might be a bit concerned about the statement "Rolfing is classified as a pseudoscience, and is generally seen as quackery." But then again, he is pretty adventurous and not overly influenced by human opinions.

  • WendyLuvsCatzWendyLuvsCatz Posts: 40,004
    edited August 24

    I thought it was something to do with a discraced Aussie expatriate singer/painter in  the UK who sang a song about 2 little boys who had 2 little toys...

    each had a wooden horse blush

    Cloudflare like clockwork hit me again in this thread, I almost bailed because of something that happened last time, it is telling me something I swear

    Post edited by WendyLuvsCatz on
  • barbultbarbult Posts: 26,156

    WendyLuvsCatz said:

    I thought it was something to do with a discraced Aussie expatriate singer/painter in  the UK who sang a song about 2 little boys who had 2 little toys...

    each had a wooden horse blush

    Cloudflare like clockwork hit me again in this thread, I almost bailed because of something that happened last time, it is telling me something I swear

    This forum software can be a real pain. Whatever you do, don't type a long message and then select  "Check Spelling". For me it totally locks up and all my typing is eternally lost. "Enable SCAYT" seems pretty safe, though. Gateway Error is a big pain, too. I think that is what you are suffering from. It seems particularly bad around this time.

  • barbultbarbult Posts: 26,156
    edited August 24

    Gifts for Milly

    Richard: I boxed up some of my things to give to Milly. I'm sure Jack will appreciate her getting new things to play with, so he doesn't have to buy her stuff. 

    • I'm giving her my Stetson and dart gun to go along with the horse, just in case she wants to join a posse. I hope she doesn't shoot the horse like I did.
    • I'm giving her my snare drum and drumsticks. I can't grasp those sticks with my paws, so I just have to bang on the drum like a bongo. The result is not the same. Out it goes. Lola will be glad.
    • I'm giving her my trumpet. My arms aren't long enough to reach the keys. Every note sounds the same. She'll be able to play lovely music for her family.
    • I never could get the hang of the joystick to drive that Off Road truck. I'm sure Milly is more coordinated. Having hands will help. I added fresh batteries.
    • I tossed in some quarters, so when she is old enough to drive (4 or 5, I would guess), she can go downtown and learn on the mechanical tractor that I have mastered so well.

     

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  • memcneil70memcneil70 Posts: 5,237

    Generosity, thy name is CAT!

    Or Richard in a pinch.

  • backgroundbackground Posts: 588
    edited August 24

    If you wanted to continue with the Western theme you could do a remake of 'The Good, The Bad. and the Unlikely', but you might need a cannon.

    Think if Richard running around the graveyard while the orchestra plays "The Ecstasy of Catnip".

    Post edited by background on
  • barbultbarbult Posts: 26,156

    This story has gotten a bit out of hand, like all of my stories. They take on a life of their own. That is the fun of it. I think it is time to close this one. Richard has successfully put his wild cowboy days behind him. He has discovered the joy of giving and made a little girl happy. Jack might not be as happy, but that's how the cookie crumbles. He'll probably get his jackhammer back, and his wife will probably be happy when he replaces the cracked concrete with clean pavers. All is well that ends well. We'll just assume that it all ends well...

    I thank everyone for their comments and suggestions, especially Richard, who is such a good sport about being depicted in such a silly manner. He's always ready with a witty comeback that spurs me on. Everybody offered clever ideas that made the story fun to build. Without reader comments, this would be BORING. So thanks!

    I want to gather up more of my old stories from other threads and put them here. That is my next task, until I stumble upon a new story that refuses to go untold.

  • Richard HaseltineRichard Haseltine Posts: 107,864
    edited August 24

    barbult said:

    vwrangler said:

    barbult said:

    ROLF!

    Inspiration comes from many places. Thank you, Mary, Richard, and Simon.
    Richard can't stop twitching after riding the jackhammer "Pogo stick" all the way home.

    Well, after that, now he really needs to be rolfed. 

    He might be a bit concerned about the statement "Rolfing is classified as a pseudoscience, and is generally seen as quackery." But then again, he is pretty adventurous and not overly influenced by human opinions.

    Well, I liked the sound of

    Rolfing is typically delivered as a series of ten hands-on physical manipulation sessions sometimes called "the recipe". Practitioners combine superficial and deep manual therapy with movement prompts

    thinking strokes and ear-scratches, but then it got to 

    The process is sometimes painful.

    so pass, I think. Edit: though I suppose that does depend on who feels the pain.

    Post edited by Richard Haseltine on
  • Richard HaseltineRichard Haseltine Posts: 107,864

    memcneil70 said:

    Generosity, thy name is CAT!

    Or Richard in a pinch.

    I know, I'm even giving away a box!

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