A Year After My father's Death My Life Is A Total Mess & Now My House Gets Robbed
Jay_NOLA
Posts: 1,145
I haven't posted or reply to any one in over a year since my father passed away on the night of the 24th of Setember.
I was having afriend log in to my account for me for a few months and to handle some things I used to do online.
Sorry, I neveer git to reply to any of the messeges I got sent. I don't have them in my in box anymore now too. I now, wish I had replied and contacted evryoe and tried to stay active.
Today is the one year aniversery of his death. He died because of Xeralto and not being given proper medical treatment by a hospital and was sent home from the ER while still bleeding and died an hour latter.
I've contacted a lwayer and have one handeling the medical legal issues His death isn't ging to be worth much due to Loisiana law as it has caps not in other areas.
I also, have my right arm injured and have several other medical issues due to misstreatment doe to me by the same hospital on August 27-September 1st of this year. The atrm and hand pain got so bad that I had to have afriend drive me to another hospiatl ER on Sunday and I had gone to an Urgent care facility and was given and am on Tramadol and 800mg perscription strength Ibuprofine.
I'm having trouble trying to find ot what to do about the misstreatmet and a lawyer that can help. The whole incident is ahorror story and I can't post it in detail as I can only type with one hand. The medical facility also lied repeatedly to my emergency contact about several issues too.
I lost touch with many of my local friends and just about all my online ones since his death and everything that has occured since.
On Monday I left the hosue for under 2 hours to go to a drug store and get aperscription, and returned to find the back door damged, rear window smashed, TV and other things stollen. My laptop was in the trunk of my care so thankfull they didn't get it.
All the cash I had in the house was stollen and I have less ahn $400 in my bank account and thousans of dollars of damage to the house and missing items.
The police said a high probability existed that they would try and rob the house again at soe point in the future.
The police also took over 13 hours to show up too.
I only get $720 a month in aid and Louisiana and the city don't give me much aid at all despite that I am now considerd disable due to various medical conditions and my healh has been deteriorating and getting worse in the past year.
I used to be able to havesome functionality in the past, but now I don't due to the damage on my arm and hand and other medical issues.
My laptop broke a month and half ago too, and I have had over 4 messed up tech repairs on it. Ecah tech who worked on it ended up breaking and messing up more stuff on it. I have to send it in back in for a repair this week as theyare covering any and all repairs on it due to the poor tech support. They broke a lot of the plastic on the casing, damaged the card reader on it, and it doesn't power down right now.
I'm very scared and not sure what to do. I'm depressed afraid to leeave the house, and in constant physical pain most of the time.
I won't go into any more details on things at the moment.
I'm still alive.
I'll try and get back via PM if anyone messeges me when I can go to my fiend's house. I'll also send my phoe to anyone who wants it, as I ,ay not be able to type a long reply.
Any advice anyone, or recomendations on wat to do? I haven't had much luck with things and tey don't have much in the way of programs that offer the assitance I need I discovered.
oey for being out of touch for so long and not going into good detail on some things.
I hhope everyone has not been having the rough nightmarish time I've beenn having in the past year.
- Jay
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Comments
I'm glad to hear you are well, but sorry to hear your home was burglarized.
I know the feeling after being burgled, in one case I did not lose much, just a video camera with my 40th birthday party on it, the loss of that tape upset me a lot more than losing the camera. I never lost much the other times either as simply had nothing much of value to steal.
Old tv crappy secondhand furniture no jewellery, mostly only had books.
The car even would not start for them and they abandoned it down the road and the repairs were about equal to my excess insurance anyway.
It is the feeling of uneasiness that is the worst, that someone has violated your private space, oddly I have a nice big smart TV now I never watch and pray that if I am burgled it will be sufficient for them that they will leave my computer alone sadly that would not be the case.
the people doing this are so desperate for a fix of their drugs they have no thought for others and the heartache they cause.
Sadly I cannot help in your situation except to offer words of sympathy and hope things get better, keep your laptop close to you and I hope your financial situation improves and of course the pain, there is so much wrong in the world it does not take much to find many far worse off and that can make one very grateful in spite of all the bad, your DAZ content is safe at least that cannot be stolen, that is one thing to think about, you can always redownload it when you can afford another computer,
Try to get in contact with your old friends, make new ones, read books at the library, these things are free and important and will help more than any thing else I can suggest as it gives you support and purpose, after being robbed a few times I stopped buying anything of value for a very long time and oddly it has remained a habit, I found things to do that did not involve possessions.
The big exception being my PC I have spent waaaaaaay to much on and will probably devastate me if stolen, sadly I have no power over that just try to enjoy it while I have it and try not to think about it.
I am glad to hear from you again, I have thought about you a few times as I am sure other online friends have, get in contact, stay in contact as I said that is free and can be done at a library too, and any sort of online interests not just 3D cannot be as easily taken from you either if you have good passwords unlike physical goods.
so a new laptop is prob your goal to save for slowly, take a year, maybe two and keep it with you is all I can suggest.
Sorry to hear about your house; I spend a lot on my computer too, but what isn't replaceable is all your documents and family stuff; back them up, if you can, the really imporant stuff online, otherwise a hard drive kept separate. Recovering after the loss of a loved one just takes time; only that helps, at least in my experience.
It is good to hear from you, even though what you're going through isn't a picnic. Please PM your phone number to me so I can call you.
Doctors and hospitals are always bad experiences in my opinion. The bungles to your laptop are inexcusable. I would have been carted to jail for the screaming fits I would throw if that happened to my laptop.
I realize it may be hard to visit the site and this thread, given your laptop problems, but there are lots of folks here who care and are interested in your wellbeing... Please don't hesitate to post here or feel no one cares. Now that we are aware, there is concern and where there is concern there is caring, and where there is caring there is... I don't know... Someone sitting there caring?... I'm not good at sayings, least of all inspirational sayings...
I know I tend to be a little too lighthearted in the way that I write and it may not seem very caring or even a little inconsiderate, but I feel maybe (hopefully) making someone smile at least once with something in my replies is more important than constantly being serious or getting to a point quickly... You may be wondering why I just said that... So was I for a moment, because I forgot my point, which is (now that I just remembered it), that I believe very much in the idea that letting your troubles get you down, keeps you down and amplifies any other difficulties that comes long... The trick is to find something that makes you happy, smile or laugh... Hold on to that and it will pull you through... Troubles are like a cloud of darkness that will cling to you... Well, darkness doesn't really cling... It's more like a cloud of hungry mosquitoes that if you stumble, will envelop you and drain you of all hope... You have to move forward and break free... And stay away from swamps... Yeah, like I said... I'm very bad with coming up with helpful imagery too... I thought about "tiny hope vampires", instead of mosquitoes, but I don't think those really exist... At least I hope not.
But anyway, my point was... I read the part about you not wanting to go out and being afraid and depressed, and especially the part about you being in pain...
If you have any mobility, please use it... I have no idea of your age or physical status, but if you can... Find things, small cheap things to keep you outside and occupied... Even if it's just a trip to the library... If your local library sucks, find a good one across town, take the bus if you can. Maybe make it a goal to visit places nearby like historic sites or parks... Even if your local park is just a small lot with a busted bench two trees and a chalk outline of a dead guy... Take some chalk with you and draw a funny face on it... Feed pigeons in in the park... If you don't like the pigeons, feed them to the alligators (you said you are in Louisiana, and the only place there I ever went, had an alligator "problem"). Get a map of your city, and mark out places to go... Or even malls if they have them near you... Places like that often have those electric carts, so if you need it, those might be available (if it's a long trip, call info and find out if they have them and if they are free)... You don't have to buy anything... The goal is the trip. If thats not good... Look in the paper or phone book (they still make those... Right?)... Find a Pizza place that sounds good, one across town, somewhere nice... Go there and buy one stupid slice, but go there. Go on google maps, drop to street view check out your town or city (you said city) and explore it... Find somewhere interesting and go there...Whatever your mobility level, pick a reasonable goal you can achieve, but get out... If you sit at home, the darkness, fear and depression will smother you... It will make your physical problems get worse and your depression will increase... Each will feed off the other until there is nothing left of you... Tell the pain it's had its fun, remember some hero you once had, and ask yourself if they would let the pain have its way... Tell the pain you are stronger than it, and if it has to, it'll come with you, but you are not staying home alone with it letting it feed off you.
If you can walk a block... Walk it. Get out as often as possible. If your neighborhood is crummy, try to pick places to go outside of it... Even if it is further away. Unless your doctor has said specifically "don't exert yourself", gradually getting out as much as possible will lift your spirit... And you have to find a way to do that. And if you feel uncomfortable around other people, well one- screw them, you are none of their business and two ignore them... Focus on other things. Sometimes people with depression feel the world is looking at them and judging them... Trust me, human beings are stupid and self centered and 90% of them don't notice anything but their own reflection, and at least 10% of those have trouble recognizing that... Even if you had a long spikey tail and leathery wings, I doubt more than one or two people would even notice... And they'd forget the moment something shiny distracted them. If you can get out, focus on the bird in the tree (I say that in case your neighborhood is really crappy and has only one live tree and one ratty bird), not any of the depressing city stuff... Watch out for bumps in the sidewalk and speeding garbage trucks, but also concentrate on the sun on your face, a refreshing breeze, the chirping bird, that gorilla who got loose from the zoo, stole a bicycle and just rode by... I've known a few people who were in similar circumstances and this kind of thing can make a huge difference... (Not the gorilla part... That only happened to one, and though the gorilla eventually went his own way, that person and the gorilla still write each other)... Keep a positive attitude as best you can... You matter and nothing could or should be able to take that from you. Ever.
When I was a kid, I had a pretty crappy time... One of my ways of dealing with it was to do what I just mentioned... Well, not the gorilla thing, but I did make friends with an orangutan at the zoo but the whole thing got weird after a while and she started wanting me to smuggle in Snickers bars and potato chips and... Eh.. Anyway... I'd pick places to go, and I'd take a notebook with me and either write on the way there or sit there in the freezing cold, blistering heat or squirrel infested hell and write what I was thinking... Which could range from deep thoughts to funny ideas/stories or murderous anti-squirrel rantings. I don't think it was ever what could be called a journal or anything... Sometimes it was ideas for stories, sometimes whole short stories, sometimes manifestos... Or ransom notes... No... Ignore that... The last two... Mostly it was just observations about the world around me and what was going on... Sometime a busted up bench can be a window to the world... And a ticket away from your troubles. And maybe that's something to try too... It's pretty cheap to do and you don't have to be good at writing... Hell, just look at my rambling crappy way of writing... You don't even have to spell good... God knows, I smell terrible... That was autocorrect messing up, but since I need a shower, I'm leaving it as the one time autocorrect got something right. The point is you can use that as a distraction... And maybe it can help you lay things out more clearly and help you understand yourself or the world or squirrels better... I forgot, Louisiana... Understand alligators better.
I don't have any helpful suggestions about your laptop... Not legally helpful anyway... Nothing that does not involve beating the bumbling techs with the laptop... Thats technically illegal in most states and probably bad for the laptop... But, based on what you mentioned about how quickly the police responded to your problem, it looks like you'll have a twelve or thirteen hour escape window... But despite that,don't do that sort of thing... Because violence is bad and violent, and you shouldn't do it... See, that last one would make a terrible saying.
Have you ever heard of something called FreeCycle? I think I spelled that right... It's a worldwide network of organizations or groups that post stuff people are getting rid of that someone else might be able to use, for free... Computers are rare, but if there is one group or chapter near you... Ya never know... You might come across something useful. You usually have to pick the stuff up yourself, which may make for an adventure... Hopefully not a bad one, but at least you'll get out. Anyway this should point you in the right direction if you are interested...https://www.freecycle.org
I should probably go now, because if you haven't died of boredom reading this, you probably are pretty close to throwing whatever you are reading this on by now... Anyway... Be well, and by no means feel obligated to consider doing any of the stuff I mentioned, especially the stuff involving gorillas, squirrels or laptop related beatings. I understand what works for one person may not work for someone else, and could even lead to them getting attacked by rabid armadillos... Which whatever you may have heard, was not entirely my fault... Mostly not entirely... Maybe a little. Regardless of rabid armadillos bites, just get well, stay well try to find something to make you smile or laugh... Even if it is just laughing manically to yourself, that's a start.
Let us know how you are doing.
-Vic
equal not totally the same but also not good
Jay I am so sorry for you situation and hope that there will be some resolution for you soon, but know that there are many people here who care and will listen to you and offer what they can to help. Sometimes the thing a person needs most is someone to listen and empathize and care.
The medical records are stored at the hospitals facility, sometimes separately, and you should get a copy and see if they falsified any of your information/doctored it up (no pun intended) or for it to go missing if they sense trouble coming. Get your hands on your files before stirring up a hornet's nest.
Find a lawyer that charges if they win (plenty advertise on t.v. frankly) and seriously, consider contacting a television station that has a consumer protection reporter about some of this. Social media attention might get the ball rolling for the hospital to settle with you out of court- but do not settle with them yourself, get a lawyer to do that.
There are portable burglar alarms, my favorite is the barking dog. It's like a door stop and when the door is pushed, you'd think a rottweiler was there to greet you and rip you apart. There are other more common ones, think Radio Shack, Sears, etc- that have the loud sirens, and they really can be quite inexpensive. For doors and windows. Thinking about you!
Thanks,
@everyone Thanks for replying. I have some specific replies back as I had time to dictate them to my friend who is typing this for me as I dictate and watch to make sure everything is correct.
I'm not sure if I ought to get an alrm sytem put in at the moment the price of an alarm and service are going to impact my budget to negatively as I'll be locked into a contract and will never be able to save up to replace anything that was stolen it seems.
The police told me on Tuesday when they showed up back up at the house after I called to report some additional thins stollen. Like all the money I had saved up to cover emergency repairs and for the house taxes, etc. were stolen along with the other things reported intially.
I have takes and insurance due on the house in the next 2 months and don't now waht to do about them now.
If I wasn't on disability currently I would have keep that money in the bank. (If your on disability the government only lets you keep a ceratin amount in the bank or you lose your benefits. So I have had to save and keep money out of it to cover big expenses.)
I got but on disabilty not that long ago due to various medical conditions that developed slowly over the last couple of years and worsened.
Anythoughts on if I ought to get an alarm or not?
@JaguarElla,
from what the police told me and some info on what I learned from a neighbor this is most likely drug related and the criminals have robbed numerous house in the area with the same m.o., they keep the target under surveillance for a few weeks or months and then rob them when they think they are not home.
In my case I usually go to the local public library at the same time for a hour or two each day and go home.
On they day I was robbed I left to get a perscription that I was given in the ER the day before. I almost didn't leave the house.
@Novica, I have tried to contact several lawyers so far, including the one that is handling my father's death. I also called the state bar association and they have no lawyers that will take a case like mine.
One lawyer I spoke to did indicate that this is definite malpractice, among other things, and he referred me to me another lawyer.
One big problem is Louisiana law has numerous changes that went into effect back in 2006 that makes it nearly impossible to pursue legal and puts major caps on damages. Most lawyers will not touch a medical malpractice in Louisiana unless it is a wrongful death because of this from what I was told by several lawyers I talked to.
So far I did manage to find one lawyer that will do an initial consultation.
I strongly suspect that they are going to try and alter the records and falsify stuff which is why I did not mention certain things online and with any discussions I've had with any medical personnel regarding this.
They did try to alter and falsify some stuff regarding my father's death from what I understand. They are claiming that they asked him repeatedly if he was on anti-coagulants and supposedly he said no. My father couldn't remember most of his medicines and had no idea of what he was on. So if they wanted to know what he was taking. He would have said, "I don't know, you have to call my son." and he would have called me since that is what he always did when he went to a doctor and was asked about his medicine.
I this case they have witness to some of the stuff involved and things the hospital did along with photographic evidence of what they did to my right arm. My friends daughter took a picture of it with her cell phone and my right forearm was all purple and yellow. Some of the other things they did could open them up for criminal charges from what I was able to find out. One thing in particular that happened could cause them to want to settle very quickly if it was disclosed to enough social media outfights or would cause them a good amount of serious negative publicity consequences and open them up for investigation. (I don't mid talking about this on the hone with anyone that wants specifics, but I'm being very careful not to post any information about it.)
@McGyver,
hey Vic I'll make a note of the freecycle site. I can walk. I just can't drive a car with the pain medicine and the arm pain gets so intense that I can't do anything it seems. Thanks for the long reply I wasn't bored at all reading it.
I'm having a friend type my reply post back for me while I dictate it to them becuase of that.
@atticanne
I sent you a PM with my phone number. Let me know if you got it.
Yep, got it. My daughter came into town and took me to Walmart. First time I went to any store other than the grocery in over 2 months. Since it was late when we got back, I'll call you tomorrow.
Keep your chin up. Or is it nose up and chin to the grindstone?
Please note that legal matters should not be discussed on the forum equally for the protection of Daz and those bringing the case (discussing it in public can lead to the case being dismissed).
@everyone,
I ended up going back to an Urgent care facility on Sunday and they put me on Hydrocodone for the pain. I'm trying to get someone to take me to an ER that can do a check for a blood cloat and nerve damage, as I can't drive at the moment and my friend who would have is having car trouble. They wanted to give me a shot to help with the arm & hand pain, but my insurance wouldn't cover it. Only 3 ER facilitries can do that in my area an one of them is out of the question as that is that same place that injured me among other things.
Right now I'm just talking to my friend over the phone and they are typing in the reply to the forum while I dictate it to them. while I wait for the pain medicine to put me to sleep.
I also found out that the hospital that injured my arm did something else that can get them into serious legal trouble today too. I will not go into any details on that on the forum.
@Cris you can send me a PM and I can send you contact info if you want to talk about anything that can't be discussed on the forum.