Thank you Daz Community

G'day gang! I haven't been here in quite awhile, so long in fact that there are probably many new users who don't recognize my name so I'll introduce briefly in this missive.

My pen name is Ghastly. Long ago when the internet was new I did a NSFW webcomic called Ghastly's Ghastly Comic. It was a very successful pioneering webcomic and I enjoyed making it very much, unfortunately I had a career ending mental breakdown due to over 40 years of living with severe but undiagnosed and untreated OCD and related anxiety disorders. It was a very long and rocky road to recovery and for most of that time I just didn't have the mental energy to publish on anything resembling a schedule. A few comics here and there experimenting with different art techniques but that was pretty much it. I still drew picture which I published on my Newgrounds site but they were few and far between, but it was my illustration work which brought me to Daz studio.

I was annoyed with those little wooden artist model dolls that never seem to bend correctly nor do they hold the pose you put them in and thought to myself "surely someone must have made a digital version of these dolls that I can pose for reference purposes" and one of the few fans I still had following my work told me about Daz Studio and said it might do what I wanted. It was exactly what I wanted and more. I could quickly put together a scene using a plain nude and bald Genesis figure and some primitives with a grid texture for perspective guides and do a very low quality render of the scene to use as a reference for a drawing. Then I began to get into modeling using Hexagon at first but expanding my tools to include 3DCoat and Marvelous Designer. I found I particularly enjoyed making clothes although I have made some prop pieces as well.

Creating models for Daz Studio was a wonderful form of occupational therapy allowing my mind to focus on something other than tearing itself to pieces. I could no longer meaningfully publish my own creative works but with Daz Studio I was able to make assets that other people could use for their own works of art and that was enough. I take great delight every time I see someone's artwork featuring one of my assets, especially when I see people making art with my original anime chibi figure Lolo Hai. It felt nice to know even if I couldn't make my own art I could at least help other people make their's. Thank you, each and ever one of you who have ever used one of my assets in your art, I am very honoured you found my work useful.

Some of you may have noticed I've been away from the Daz Community since pretty much the start of the 2020 misery and may have been wondering why there have been no new Daz assets from me in two years. I thought it would be only proper for me to take a moment to explain my absence and why there have been no new Daz assets during this time and why there will most likely not be any new assets from me for Daz Studio for at least the foreseeable future. After my breakdown, I pretty much got by lending my talents to other people's projects. As an actor and composer I'd been working a lot in theatre (with some TV and Film gigs too). I am privileged to have a lot of very talented friends who are directors and producers and haven't been shy of work but my work has been on other people's projects, not my own. Come 2020 and with the theatres closed I was suddenly without access to one of my biggest venue for artistic expression.

An odd thing happened though. I started producing my own works again. Silly things. Nonsense things. Trivial things. But oh! Such fun things! And it felt good, very good just to be making something again, something of my own, telling my own stories. It felt good. It felt really good. Where once I had an audience in the low millions now I only have an audience of dozens but honestly I don't think my mental state is yet to the point where I can handle more than that. My subject matter is niche and the humour esoteric but I'm having fun none the less and I'm now starting to publish frequently but not on a schedule. Taking things day by day but getting stronger.

What's nice is that Daz Studio, the software and community that carried me through my creative drought after my metal breakdown is still part of my creative process. I like the game World of Warcraft. I used to be a subbed player and a regular poster on WoW's forum. One of the threads on the forum we were talking about armour and clothing we would like to see in the game and rather than just draw a sketch of the armour I thought would be cool I just rigged a WoW gnome female for Daz Studio and made some new armour for her with Marvelous Designer and Hexagon which the other forum members quite liked. So then I had a WoW gnome female with leader biker armour and no real use for it other than posting clothing ideas on Blizzard's forum. Well last summer I got a voice acting gig and knew working on that project wasn't going to give me any free time to make a subscription worthwhile, so I let my sub expire thinking I'd resub once my gig was over. I created a Free-To-Play toon just so I could pop into the world of Azeroth every now and then when I just wanted to be there in that world and I decided to create it on an RP server too just because I've never done anything other than PvE and I thought it would be an interesting thing to explore. I've been quite surprised to discover that playing a Free-to-Play toon on an RP server is, for me, actually for more fun than playing a subscribed toon on a PvE server. My education is in anthropology so studying and commenting on the culture of the RP server fascinates me, so I started making short little improvised slice of life videos about my new Free-to-Play wow gnome, Pookamhura. Just silly nonsense but so much fun to make. Then I started composing songs inspired by the adventures I was having with this little gnome in the mean old world and making little videos for the songs. It feels so good to be publishing something of my own again even if it's not something with any commercial value like my previous work. It feels like health.

And the nice part, Daz Studio still gets to be part of it because that little gnome in biker leathers I made just to joke around with other players is now the model I use to render the title cards for Pook's YouTube videos. So even though I'm not using it for much I'm still using Daz Studio and that feels good because Daz Studio, software and community were both part of my recovery. Thank you for that. Thank you everyone who has used my assets, who have invited me to be a part of their artwork. I don't know if or when I'll be making more Daz Studio assets. I hope the assets I did make will continue to be enjoyed and employed by the community. Even though I will no longer be making Daz assets I'll still be using the software and will probably still show up on the forums from time to time. I just wanted to drop a note to let some of the older Daz users know I'm okay and getting stronger day by day.

https://youtu.be/ROKWrdF7pwU

Comments

  • DustRiderDustRider Posts: 2,691

    I definitely remember you!! So glad that you doing well. Recovery can be a long and difficult process,  but it sounds like you're getting excellent help and support.  OCD AND anxiety can be a debilitating combination.. Hope to "see" you around more again ... but no pressure,  

  • caravellecaravelle Posts: 2,259

    As a die-hard fan of your 3D models, I'm very happy to hear that you're getting better and better.

    However, I am the one who has to thank you for all the great outfits and characters. But if the benefit was/is mutual, all the better! I hope you find some time for new Daz models soon… wink

    The link is great, thank you!!! Your talent is really extraordinary.

  • McGyverMcGyver Posts: 6,995

    I remember you and did notice that you hadn't been around for a while, but I figured since you are pretty talented, you were probably busy and up to other stuff.

    I'm glad you are doing better now and I'm sorry I wasn't aware you were going through difficult times.

    You should know that your contributions here have been very helpful... not just the assets you've shared but your input as well... you answered a question I had about 3D Coat a few years ago, I guess I asked it in a profoundly confusing way, and nobody else was able to help, but you understood and it was very helpful... sadly I've forgotten what that issue was, but I remember you helping... so thanks again!

    I know it's not very useful to suggest, but there are a couple of thread here that have been going on for years, ones that are very Off Topic, where people just make random observations, jokes, puns, and other commentary that isn't necessarily 3D related... sometimes it's fun to just visit them and stay in touch with the other old forumites... so if you are ever bored, or just want to say something or get something off your chest, they are always there as a way to stay in touch with the rest of us.

    Well, I hope to see you around again, regardless if you aren't making assets, your sense of humor is nicely twisted and your commentary is always a welcome read.

    Cheers.

  • glaseyeglaseye Posts: 1,305

    Yep, the name rings a bell.... ( :) )

    And for those who don't know, a list of (some of) Ghastly's items can be found here.....

    https://poserdazfreebies.miraheze.org/wiki/Category:Ghastly

     

  • WendyLuvsCatzWendyLuvsCatz Posts: 37,711

    welcome back heart

    Also I know many who are perfectly fine but moved on from DAZ or at least the forums wink so was not worried but glad you are OK

  • NovicaNovica Posts: 23,859

    @ghastlycomic  Just glad you're doing what you need to do for your mental health. Always nice to see you in the forums and I hope things continue to go your way. Enjoy your creative talent and do what makes you feel good! 

  • @ghastlycomic, I definitely recognized your name immediately.  I've used several of your props and characters over the years.  I also used your sci-fi build pack in some of my renders in recent months, and actually built an elaborate space-ship interior for a comic-book narrative I plan to produce down the road, once some other stories that take place earlier than that one are in the can.

    Good to hear from you, maybe we'll see more from you again when things improve in your life.  In any event, I send happy vibes your way.  laugh

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