OK, I realize I have contributed mainly to the goofy in here. If that isn’t as welcome as I thought, I am sorry.
On the Forums I am used to (Rendo) a long thread is one that goes on for more than one page.
If I don’t really complain that much, there are reasons for that.
My mother lived with me for 4 years after my Dad died. The 4th year of that time I took an early retirement because she would cry when I left for work in the morning. Over that last year with her at home, her macular degeneration took the rest of her sight and then senile dementia took almost all the rest of her from me. I had to do something I had repeatedly told her I would never do. I put her in a nursing home.
When I visit her she sometimes knows who I am, sometimes not, She has become very dysphasic, so most of our conversations are one-sided. She says Mama, Daddy, and God a lot, rarely using them as anything other than substitutes for other words she cannot recall. She does the same thing with words that rhyme with “-ag”, such as rag, nag, bag, sag etc.
If I am there at mealtime, I help feed her with a spoon.
I long for the brief flashes of memory that she has from time to time. The only truly meaningful conversations we have are when I tell her I love her. She tells me she loves me too. One day not long ago, she said something she had not said in a very long time. She said it often when I was growing up, and it was said in a humorous way but she always meant every word. It was this:
When I told her, “I love you.Mama” she would say “I love you more.”
Not much huh? But it meant the world to me to hear it again.
I always cry after every visit.
I have diabetes, high blood pressure, high cholesterol, and clinical depression (big surprise, there, huh?) and take more medicine in a day than I used to take in a month 10 years ago.
So why don’t I complain more?
Firstly because I’m in a nursing home a lot, where I learned a valuable truth: There is always someone worse off than me.
And lastly, complaining doesn’t make me feel one damn bit better.
But being goofy does.
If you came along with me on this long journey of a post, thank you for your compassion and understanding. I do appreciate it.
Finally, this post is not to “put anyone in their place”. I can definitely relate to all that has been said in here, both heartfelt and lighthearted. And I do hope I have responded in an appropriate way when any of you have voiced real concerns.